I don't watch the news.....really....

"I don't watch the news...it's depressing, creates high anxiety for me...and my kids become gripped by fear that the catastrophes that happen all over will strike our home. I am doing my part and praying...but I can't stop living and sit and watch the count of hurt/dead people rise...I cannot emotionally handle it. In fact, did you know our society...and it tends to be children, are beginning to show signs of PTSD from all the news inundating their lives w/ the weather tragedies, bombings, murders, etc. I choose to protect them from things that they cannot emotionally handle either....It's horrible what happen. I'm waiting to see where God would lead us to give to relief, if He does. I will do my part, but I will enjoy today w/ my family, because like what the news proved today, you never know when your last will be. I will take advantage of having breath as long as I have. I will grieve.."

A true response on FB today to a friend, who I think was trying to make me feel guilty about posting about my broke dryer.

But....

• Is it healthy to sit and dwell on death? 
• Is it healthy to sit and do nothing and just watch the news all day?
• Is it insensitive to not post the numbers of dead people? 
• Is it insensitive to not acknowledge it because what more can one say?

The news stations, the radio, and CNN.com do a great job of keeping us all up to date. I am....I was speechless on the topic.

I am so sad for the people who lost their lives in this freak tornado accident. What a sad dilemma for all those who lost children and moms, dads, grandparents, aunts and uncles, friends, and on and on. I cannot imagine what it is like. Although, I have a few very dear friends who know what it is like to lose a child or parent in a tragic, unexpected event, and it's just awful. I have been praying off and on all day for those people. What they need now is their physical needs met, Critical Incident Stress Management by Chaplains and Grief Counselors...and all the prayer they can get!

What this does provide is an opportunity for people to help, an opportunity for God's people to rise up and help those in need with funds that can feed and clothe, and diaper.

I am not a person to sit in awe and flip from every station to see who is reporting what...although, I don't even have cable to do that anyways....but I stay informed, and I pray...routinely...throughout the day, waiting to see how God would move my heart to help.

Yesterday was a tragedy, but let us realize we are not in control...and that we truly do not know when our last breath is....we do not know when our last meal with loved ones will be, so let us seize the days of our personal lives with those we love and cherish. Let's make sure our relationships are healthy, we have forgiven, our kids know we love them unconditionally. Let's make sure that we have an intimate walk with the Lord and that we are spirit-led in our lives and not walking by the flesh or trapped in bondages of addiction, OCDs, judgmentalness, or bitterness. Let's make sure we are helping those right in front of us, in our path, whom we CAN help.

Folks, we may not see tomorrow, God forbid, yet it's a reality that tragedy reminds us all to well of. Let us not let another day go by without loving the unloved, and extending our hand to the hurting. Open your eyes and see, they may be in your home, your family, your workplace, your neighborhood, your classroom, the grocery store.

I pray that this tornado tragedy would stir compassion from the nations, and that God would give the survivors strength to continue on. I pray that those who lost loved ones would be comforted with a peace that surpassing all understanding. And I pray that we will meditate on the truth that we have no idea what the future holds...let us all stand right with God, ready for our last breaths, if they may come today.




***Note: I honestly choose not to live in places where hurricanes and tornadoes hit for this very reason. I do not live on the banks of a river, or on the shore line to avoid a flood. I cannot control everything, but I can lower my risk of catastrophe. Ask my husband, when we dream of moving out of smoggy Bakersfield....I say 'no' to many places....Central U.S. through tornado alley - big NO. Atlantic coastal hurricane areas - big NO....Northern U.S. too much snow or not enough sunlight....East Coast, NO...that's the terrorist fave place to bomb....the only thing I have to worry about in Bakersfield is Korea bombing CA....or an earthquake hitting, which is rare...or getting that ugly horrible valley fever. But trust me, I want out of here, since I don't want none of that...So to answer my friend, yes I hear of the news...but I cannot watch it....too much stress. Want to lower your stress levels, stop watching the news...it's horrible stuff to see and hear of...daily. I honestly don't think it's good for you....

I love MATH!

I am reminded that I love math this week. There is only one right answer, and there's a formula to use to find it. It's not subjective to the perspective of the person grading the math test. 2+2 = 4 and when x = 1, 4x + 8= 12...and then there are all the other geometry theorems and calculus logrithims (sp?) to give us even more challenges...yet, there is only one right answer.

You ever forewarn someone of something and ask them to pay careful attention to something, and then when the very thing you warn them, they disregard...and then it somehow negatively impacts you, how do you feel? Mad, angry, confused, frustrated.

Frustration that it could've been avoided.

Business minus Follow-Up = Failing Customer Service
Business plus Follow-Up = Happy Clients and Referrals

Again, I love math.

I have been a loner much of my life. I don't really like people interfering with 'my' success. When I was a realtor, I went crazy since my commission check was dependent on the pest control, the roofing co., a lender, an escrow officer, and the seller's. All these people made up a team for the escrow to close and everyone to get paid. If someone didn't do their job, my car payment was late! I hated that part, my success of closings dependent on others. My paycheck dependent on others.

Frustrated those years of commission-only real estate work.
Frustrated because I truly cannot control others.

I can control how I let my emotions affect me. And if you know me, I am a very emotional person. Although, I'm not usually one to get mad. Call me names, don't like me, my kids...whatever, it's your loss. But, become the roadblock of me reaching a goal???? My blood pressure goes up just thinking about it.

I see an opportunity to do subtraction here. Or better yet, extraction. I need to extract that controlling perfectionism that drives my mind to exhaustion.

My husband. My wonderful husband, told me of the story of FedEx (check for validity). The story goes something about the guy who started it. He turned in a paper in his class on a great business idea...The idea was of FedEx, the ability to OVERNIGHT. The teacher said it would never work. The guy ditches school and opens up FedEx! FedEx is a verb in our language....just like Google. We tell people, 'I'll fedex it to you'....not 'I will overnight ship it to you'.

People can help you. And sometimes people can get in the way.

Me? I'm a 'rules follower'. I love rules. That's why I love math. Interesting enough, I love to write to. But I have learned that I don't like rules for my writing....only for math. Yet, I am met with a rule to 'follow the rules of formatting'....so I will.

What's more important, it comes down to me following my self-prescribed rule:

Always do your best, knowing that I nearly can do anything.

Because, with God, all things are possible.

So with that...I will put my nose back into the books...and add up the hours I will sit and type, and retype, and create, and recreate.

Hey, we only get one shot at this life...and when I am 80ish....I want to look back at my marriage, my boys, my career, and ministry and be able to say with satisfaction:

 

I truly did my very best!!!

This is the 'tentative' conclusion...

Undoubtedly, there is a need for a reconciliation ministry for the grieved and displaced Christians who have suffered hurt within the church walls. George Barna’s studies defend this hypothesis and conclusion. Testimonies of devastated people within the Bakersfield’s Christian community substantiates that is a local issue that needs to be addressed. The frequency of these offenses that take place in Kern County does not minimize the gravity of it and should desensitize people to this injustice.  The numerous accounts of spiritual abuse actually indicate the dire need for a counseling and reconciliation ministry.

The author has discussed what needs to happen for which population. The implications of these wounds from spiritual abuse show the different aspects of people’s lives being negatively impacted by these offenses. While secrecy and fear of humiliation intimidate people into silence and isolation, the body of Christ can no longer ignore the stumbling blocks laid at the front doors of local churches. The local body of Christ is defeating itself as unbelievers and onlookers remain outside the church walls as they witness Christians hurting Christians. These mistreated people left to suffer cannot remain alone any longer - they need healing, restoration, and reconciliation.

Their wounds need to be healed, trust rebuilt, and their identity in Christ recovered. Families have been left impaired as fathers and husbands, the spiritual leaders, have stood up from their knees of prayer, walked away from their Bibles, and stepped down from places of service. The hearts who once put their hope in Christ need to be healed to live for God as the Bible teaches.

Their relationships with God need to be restored, communication with God reestablished, and their faith invigorated to believe God for impossibilities. Children have been left to suffer unnecessary chaos and disorder in their homes; marriages are strained and couples are unequally yoked because of the spiritual impairment that follows needless harm from church leaders. The minds that once put their hope in Christ need to be restored back into fellowship with God.

Friendships from church networks need to be reconciled, accountability groups reunited, and their spirits confirmed with love, grace, and mercy. Brothers and sisters in Christ have been torn apart; individuals stripped of their prayer partners and left abandoned. The souls who once had all their hope in Christ need to be reconciled back to the body of Christ, the church.

The spiritually wounded, abused, hurt, offended need help, a ministry to come alongside them to move them from pain and back into the center of God’s purpose for their lives. No longer should they be left in their despair praying that time will make the wrong right, but they should be offered a refuge to turn to for counseling and help.

The previous pages of this work contain a tentative idea for how to approach these people who share common grievances from spiritual abuse. The writer intends to reach out to about three to five individuals who have shared their stories to coordinate a test group for a trial run of this hypothesis. This would serve to verify whether or not counseling, followed by a small group study of the book ReChurch is adequate to bridge broken individuals back a vibrant connection with the Spirit of God and back into the fellowship of a church. This would allow this potential framework to be tested and validated, and present opportunity for necessary revisions. This test group could offer great feedback and confirm whether or not a small discipleship group would actually be necessary. This would verify whether or not a discipleship program needs to be further developed, and to what extent.

HOPE AFTER HURT will be formed to offer those who have suffered real grief from and through the body of Christ, church leaders, and elders. HOPE AFTER HURT will provide an environment for healing to take place. No longer will they have to stay silent and alone in their bitterness. There will soon be a ministry to help them forgive the abusers, and reconcile them back to God and to His people. Hope will be restored to those who have been hurt.