Do not feel condemned!

Opinions fly across the room. And for some, judgment is lodged at them from a pulpit. I am so sorry for this.

There's condemnation for a variety of things: divorce, drinking, use of meds (like SSRIs, sleeping medicines, any kind that helps you survive), smoking, driving fast, wearing spaghetti strap tanks, homeschooling....not homeschooling. The list goes on and on.

UNFORTUNATELY,

There is condemnation for everything,

from someone, at some point.

Attached to those...and underlying them, is condemnation for:

NOT TRUSTING GOD!

 

 

Right? "Where is your faith?" Many of them say.

 

Hey, I've got faith God can heal my asthmatic son...but by NOT just stopping his inhaler cold-turkey does not mean I am lacking faith. It means, I have faith that God is the Creator of all things...even medicine...and since the miraculous, divine healing hasn't come yet....I will use Qvar.

 

In fact, on the topic of my son, I honestly believe that the healing for his lungs awaits him OUTSIDE OF BAKERSFIELD (#1 in the nation for bad air). But we don't have relocating on the calendar yet, so on with the inhaler son!

 

See my point. I recently heard that a pastor condemns the use of Prozac from the pulpit. My jaw dropped. I lost a family member to suicide immediately following him stopping Prozac WITHOUT weaning himself off of it.

 

My question to the pastor today was:

Do you condemn ALL MEDICINES????

 

Right? If we condemn one, then shouldn't we condemn them all.

 

In fact, come to think of it, in spiritually abusive churches, proper medical treatment is discouraged and "Just rely only, solely on God"...yea, and some people die or go crazy - literally from that approach. Check out the book: Healing Spiritual Abuse by Ken Blue.

 

Do you remember King Hezekiah in 2 Kings 20? It was fig cake as his prescription from Isaiah for the recovery from his illness.

 

And in John 9, Jesus made a salve of clay for the blind man to regain sight.

 

In my "theology" God is the Creator of all things. This comes from...oh Genesis 1...and Colossians 1:16. Why do we not find the Lord in medicine? And can we be prejudice against psyche-meds and easily swallow heart medicines? Do you see the contradiction and hypocrisy in this thinking? I do.

 

So, for those of you who survive because of any med: Prozac, Cumadin, Lipitor, or Advair...or Ibuprofen....whatever it is....

 

DO NOT FEEL CONDEMNED!!!

 

Of course in all your decision-making, I encourage you to consult with the Lord for direction. But when you feel peace to take a medicine for a condition that you have prayed for divine miraculous healing and not yet got one for...do so with that peace!

 

I break off the judgment and condemnation that so many have put you under, and call you to seek the Lord and walk in faith!

 

I could share stories of how meds have helped in my family...and I shared above how a relative stopping a med wrecked our family too.

 

For the overly righteous, I am not condoning abuse of meds, pain killer addiction, and irresponsible use. That kind of use is not what I'm discussing. And is not use under the guiding of the Holy Spirit.

 

I am talking about people who have sincerely sought the Lord for a healing, direction, and confirmation...and all arrows are pointing to a doctor...and if he says try a med...then try it. If it works, HALLELUJAH!!! If not, back to the prayer closet, right?

 

And for those of you who have felt condemned, just know that people in this world, who have not experienced what you have, or have the same health issues as you:

 

DO NOT KNOW WHAT THEY ARE TALKING ABOUT!

 

Don't take it personal. Just pray that God will convict them of their judgmental attitude (and pray they are not numb to His conviction).

 

Also, people who are stuck in the bondage of judgmentalness don't even realize the bondage they are putting people under when they talk.

 

Pray for God's intervention in their lives....and pray that God will guide and lead you in all aspects about your medical needs.

 

God is a good God. I do not think God is unable to heal this day and age. I just know that we need to walk by faith. Sometimes the healing is miraculous. And sometimes God gives us the prescription of fig cake or clay! ;)

 

Above all things, "Where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom!" Find God, seek God, consult with the Lord and follow His leading marked by peace.

 

 

PEACE BE TO YOU! Luke 24:36



You may have it! But you can lose it, ask King Saul....

I have been reading in 1 Samuel in the Old Testament, off and on this month and randomly came across an interesting story.

In 1 Samuel chapters 26-31 we read that David would not kill Saul because Saul was the 'Lord's anointed'...yet, in the midst of the chapters we see Saul say of himself that he had sinned, played the fool, and committed serious error (26:21).

By 1 Samuel 28:6, Saul inquired of the Lord and the Lord did not answer him. In fact, verse 15 says that God departed from Saul, and verse 17: the Lord tore the kingdom away from Saul and gave it to David (who was upright, pleasing and no evil was found in him 1 Sam 29:6) .

By chapter 31, Saul was injured from being under siege and so he fell on his sword to end the agony. His time had come and he recognized it!

I thought it was crazy to read that King Saul, "the Lord's anointed", went wrong, turned bad. When I read this, I received it as God's way of saying....

Sometimes, people have had His anointing,

but that doesn't mean they can't turn bad,

sin, and lose their connection to the Lord.

It's like the overweight 40 year old guy w/ his small high school jersey on trying to relive the glory days. Maybe he had it going on at one time, but lost it when he grew lazy and complacent and did not do the right things to keep himself ready and prepared for action. In God's kingdom, it means remaining humble and transparent, honest, exercising your gifts and bearing fruits of the Spirit....by John 15.

Saul continually sought out David to remove David, as though David was the problem. A blaming/denial spirit? As we see by 1 Samuel 31, it's over for Saul, his day had come and he knew it. Amazing testimony of an anointed one coming to the end of the road. It also serves as a sign that God will bring about justice in due time. We truly can trust the Lord with vindication and vengeance upon the unjust, unfair, and unrepentant.

In reading this, I use it as a warning even for myself. I know that God has great things ahead for me and my husband. We know that at all times, we speak and serve an audience of One! And we recognize our nature, we recognize we are man, we are but dust, we can sin, we can make mistakes. By this recognition, we also accept that we must remain humble and transparent, repentant and forgiving, walk above reproach and uphold to high standards of integrity. God knows our hearts, so then we will aim to keep pure hearts before the Lord!

• We must not hurt others who are pouring their lives out to God.
• We must not betray, manipulate, or rule over people with harsh judgment and selfishness.
• We must not serve ourselves, but the Lord and others!

A new topic I'm diving into this week: SERVANT LEADERSHIP!

Can't wait. This is how the Lord served, why shouldn't we?

WHERE HAVE I BEEN???? FELL OFF THE PLANET??? No! Introduction to what I've been doing!

“The whole earth is full of His glory”, “This is the day that the Lord has made, I will be glad and rejoice in it” – scriptures that resonate joy and confidence in the Lord; scripture that many scoff at because of their broken heart from broken relationships from hurt and abuse endured within the church. Church hurt. We may have experienced it ourselves, or we’ve heard of it, we have friends who have endured it, and others turn a blind eye to the deeds done, and a deaf ear to the stories of agony.

There is no ‘quick-fix’ for this experience, yet some believe you can and will ‘just get over it’. How painful to endure such life-altering grief from actions of those who are in leadership of service to God. Confusion, anger, denial, rejection, isolation, sorrow, depression are just a few words that describe these emotional seasons these hurt individuals can suffer.

What is a solution? Where do they turn to? There are many out there, lost in the crowds of believers longing for healing of these wounds, searching for someone who will validate their feeling, needing someone who will listen and empathize, and seeking ministry to them to bring them back into the flock, a fellowship of believers.

After combing through numerous books and articles, and collecting stories from a network of fellow believers, it is the writer’s conclusion: There needs to be a well-publicized ministry for those who have experienced spiritual abuse from local churches.

The pages that follow will present the case for those who are hurt. Research data to represent the number of those hurt here in Bakersfield, CA are unavailable. However, from utilizing social media locally, it has been ‘unofficially’ concluded that at least 10% of the population the writer knows has suffered a ‘hurt’ from a local church.  To substantiate this assumption, we will consider George Barna’s findings and statistics through his surveys. We will also define ‘spiritual abuse’, otherwise referred to as ‘church hurts or wounds’, review a variety of scenarios and explanations that more specifically address pains from church leadership. We will also look at ‘Bob’s’ story and consider the implications from his experience, as well as the effects on other areas of his life that were impacted and where he is now. 

Bob’s story will clearly show how a church hurt necessitates counsel, support, encouragement, admonishment, and help to move forward from suffering and back into service for the Lord. As we aim to realize the gravity of these wounds, we see that church hurts, wounds, abuse are an attack on the unity of the body of Christ. Moving people from pain and back to participation in the local church is a central goal for ministry to this hurt population.

We will explore the case for counseling as an initial plan for redeeming the brokenhearted stories and renewing their identity for spiritual wholeness. In considering the magnitude of pain, specifically ‘grief counseling’ is considered and contrasted with a deliverance type ministry. The hurt individual’s own faith and dependency on God will affect the avenue to take, and since it is the goal to move them toward freedom in Christ, sensitivity to where they are spiritual will be considered.  In the exploration of the broad and general term counseling, we do encounter ‘secular counseling’, which we will address this terminology and present why this is not a doctrinally sound tactic to help believers in Christ. We will resolve there is a great need for one-on-one counseling, followed up by a small group study to move the individual from victimhood to victory.

In our evaluation of all the information read and researched, a potential recovery ministry was birthed: HOPE AFTER HURT (HAH). The focus of HAH is a ministry designed for those specifically hurt by church leadership. While the goal of HAH is wholeness, the population of individuals who have been sexually abused by church leadership would be referred for specialized help for the sexual abuse, as that is a more sensitive topic and outside of the scope of individuals HAH aims to serve. Yes, there is a great need for restoration for that population, but there seems to be various sexual abuse counselors and resources for them. HAH is proposed for the underserved group of the ‘unchurched’ and those who ‘want God, but not the church’. The goal of HAH is to complete the walk of healing with a group of individuals who have suffered similar offenses and comparable devastation from church leadership. The goal is to bring people to an environment of understanding, empathy, and renewed hope. This also serves as a reentry phase for ‘counselees’ to become part of a larger group, no longer isolated, but brought back into friendship with other Christian believers. This small group participation will bring more restoration and ease to the concept of fellowship again, which moves us closer to the goal: to recover unity in the body of Christ. After months of research, a potential book partnered with the Bible was located to take a group through reading and enrichment activities (homework). After reading this particular book, a basic framework was conceived as a potential 16-week program to offer to the hurt. ReChurch, Healing Your Way Back to the People of God by Stephen Mansfield will be shared and briefly reviewed with potential and inspired assignments to accompany it for a greater results for participants.

Additionally, a second ministry, serving as follow-up to HAH is presented as well. Keeping in mind that a central goal is for the individuals to be a part of a church, a body of believers again. Maintaining the Word of God that calls us to assemble together, THE DISCIPLESHIP HOUSE (TDH) is introduced as a small group solution to take these previously-wounded individuals back to a church body.  We will briefly discuss the term transference within the context of counseling, while it is a secular term, it does bring clarity of why TDH is presented as a non-church affiliated discipleship group. Upon completing HOPE AFTER HURT, many may have a refreshed spiritual walk, however, it is necessary to remain sensitive to the fact that some may (still) not be willing to ‘jump right back into church’ right away. It’s as though TDH is another ‘next step’ after HAH, aimed to promote and introduce individuals back to the scriptural ideals of corporate worship, exhortation, prayer, and Bible teaching. In addition to fulfilling Matthew 28:19, 20 and creating disciples who are open again to following the leading and direction of the triune God, an additional goal of TDH is to nurture a desire and trust in the hearts of the participants to return to a larger corporate church body, one in which there is greater opportunities to serve and become part of a bigger purpose for God.

It is understood that the pages that follow is not an exhaustive list of solutions. The objective is to expose the reality of spiritual abuse, yet offer a hopeful remedy through the means of biblical counseling and small group meetings.  What is presented herein is a result of testimonies of heartbreak that have been confidentially shared with the writer of this work. With a mission to truly fulfill Romans 8:28, time, energy, and listening ears were made available to read and hear the stories of true offenses. Two years ago, stories of truly life-altering events shared sketched the outline of such a need of ministry in Bakersfield, CA. With the use of the discernment of the Holy Spirit, insignificant, petty, surface issues did not motivate these conclusions. However, more research of the topic of ‘spiritual abuse’ revealed this kind of restorative ministry would supply many communities, nationwide, with a resource of recovery and redemption.

Upon introducing this possibility, we see how each individual’s experience may place them in a different tier of need, if you will. There may be instances that just group participation in HAH is sufficient for an individual, while another may need one-on-one counseling for six months to a year. A key attribute of the leaders of this kind of ministry is truly patience, in addition to a fervent belief in prayer, and belief that God will do the work of healing for individuals to rebuild their lives. These attributes point to the worldview of this writer, which is foundational to understand why the concepts and solutions have been offered herein for people who are hurt by the church.

 

www.thediscipleshiphouse.com can be visited, thanks to blogger....hopeafterhurt.blogspot.com is where we are working on what will be www.hopeafterhurt.org

 

Continue to pray for me!

LUKEWARM - What is it by definition?

You know you're a nerd when you have fun working on a 75 page paper....

Here's a little excerpt....

"Consider what ‘lukewarm’ in the Greek means, the word in which God describes the church of Laodicea in the Book of Revelation lukewarm is chliaros in the Greek, which means, “ the condition of the soul wretchedly fluctuating between a torpor and a fervor of love.”  Further definition is needed. Torpor is defined as sluggish inactivity, lethargic indifference, apathy, and dormancy; fervor on the other hand is intense heat, passion, and zeal."

Attempting to make this fit as part of my worldview, and will feel like I need to find a way later to refer back to it later when I pose the need for greater discipleship.

Why is this fun? Because it is confirming...no longer do I take offense when people try to criticize me and say that I am too passionate for Jesus...really, according to these definitions can one really be too passionate? Funny how a critical opinion can be received as an affirming compliment.

I was born for such a time as this, to be open and transparent about my faith to serve as an encourager to those who do not want to live the lukewarm life, but find acceptance for their zealous pursuit of the Lord.

It's OK to love God above all....really, it is!

Lance Armstrong & Disappointment

I typically don't blog on this topic, however, I will tie it into the topics I typically do write about.

And disclaimer: I have not googled for articles to educate myself on the topic 100%, I am responding to a few posts and conversations I've seen and had this week.

So turns out that Lance Armstrong did not win all those races NATURALLY, right? And it turns out that people are totally shocked, disappointed, and devastated over it.

I read a post that read something like, "Lance was the pinup boy for the St. Jude's Cancer Kids and they worshipped him". Hmmmm. You see where I am going?

Another friend said, "He was an ICON". Is that similar to IDOL?

I am not for one second saying what he did was right, at all. But let's put this in perspective.

We live in a society that idolizes winner, the rich, the great. Think about Tiger Woods? His affairs that devastated and betrayed his fans.

Personally, I am usually NEVER shocked by people's sin. When people come out of the closet re: drugs, affairs, or just plain 'ol 'coming out of the closet'...I say 'wow....what now?' I don't get stuck on what they did, I do however, want to know what they are going to do from this point. Will they turn away from this tragic behavior, or repeat? Do they need help getting out of that bondage? Do they need prayer? Counseling? Help? There's more to these 'devastating deeds'. There is brokenness, addiction, lust, habitual behavior that has them 'locked up'. These people need someone to come along the side of them and help them see the light and walk in it.

Unfortunately, we live in a society that glamourizes the famous, the best bodies, heros, great preachers, amazing actors, actresses, singers, doctors, inventors, etc. The list goes on and on. Look through our kids' bedrooms, what is it plastered with? Posters, bed covers, sheets of some character or something they love and possibly obsessed with. This idolatry starts young...look at your dvd collection.

My commentary on this Lance thing is this:

• I'm not shocked he used steroids for better performance.
• I am shocked at the way people are so devastated, angry and bitter.
• It's apparent that people idolized and worshipped him.
• It's sad that he would succumb to the pressure to be the best and do what it took.
• It's sad that he would have loose morals.
• It's sad he would use drugs, break the law.
• It's sad that he would jeopardize his integrity and health to win.

But that's what people, society wants. The best, the richest, the smartest, the most amazing are worshipped...and so those who are nearly there on their own buy into the lie to 'DO WHATEVER IT TAKES'.

So Lance, he met people's expectations, he amazed them. He was the most amazing and the best. But he did whatever it took to get there. The guy has come to the end of his road. His efforts for self-sufficiency has come to a close. Someone get me his number, let me call him and tell him about a 'better way'.

This kind of idolatry is similar to people of churches or organizations who lose hope with their 'leader', when he/she gets caught in sin. When the leader 'betrays' them, or someone.

The Bible clearly warns us in the first 2 of the Top Ten in Exodus 20:

• You shall have no other gods before Me.
• You shall not make for yourself an idol, or any likeness of what is in heaven above or on the earth beneath or in the water under the earth.  You shall not worship them or serve them.

These are the TOP 2 - this is why there are so many devastated over Lance...this is why so many Christians are devastated over leaders hurting them. Some how, some where the icon, leader, winner, star, etc. became a 'god' (lower case g) in their lives. People placed these people as an idol in their life and worshipped them.

Do you think perhaps this is why the Lord warned us from the start of the commandments, from the start in the Bible to NOT do this.

Clearly, the pain is warranted by the betrayal. But how often do people let that disappointment gravely and negatively affect their lives? How many fall out of fellowship with the Lord, other believers in the case of hurt from the church, church people.

Remember, we live in a 'fallen' world. A place where everyone is vulnerable to sin.

We've heard it said, 'a sin is a sin, is a sin'. Lying is as bad as adultery. Consequences and hurt may not be the same, but both are sin...and both call for repentance. Same as stealing, murder, etc. Move from the Top Ten and go into the New Testament into the book of Matthew and find what Jesus taught regarding these offenses...even with these desires in your heart is sinfulness.

Question now: Are you still shocked?

LESSON and AGREEMENT: Let's not put one person: celebrity, sports figure, friend, pastor, boss, relative, etc. above the Lord. Be mindful that they are human and have the capacity to blow it big time.

It is about expectations. If we expect people to be perfect 100% of the time, we will be disappointed. If we expect them never to say the wrong thing, do the wrong thing, or fail, we will be disappointed.

Personally, when I hear of betrayal, dishonesty...I grimace and say, 'Darn it....what a bummer'...I'm not happy about it at all. But my next words usually are: 'See, everyone still neeeds Jesus...some for the first time...some again...or more.'

 

I once heard it said, "We need our Savior everyday".

If we keep this in perspective and look at everyone around us, stars or everyday people, friends and family....when they blow it, sin, hurt, betray...hopefully we will have a heart of compassion for them and say, "They are in need of some of the Lord's forgiveness and saving grace. They need some divine help."

That's what it boils down to....WE ALL NEED MORE JESUS!