Turning down the "ANXIETY"

Looking at a "Stay-at-home Mom" many husbands would think:

"What is there to be stressed out about?"

Then they add the forbidden adage: YOU DON'T WORK!

Personally I have struggled with the whole 'stay@home' gig ever since I had my near 5 yr. old. Has nothing to do w/ my kids...just the lifestyle change of going from working 40-50+ hours a week (for 10 years) to being at HOME - ALL DAY EVERYDAY! Yes, talk about emotional ups & downs while I try to figure out what my 'job' is, right? In fact, being the compulsive list-maker that I am....I made lists for those things too!

Add some sleep deprivation to the equation from having an out-of-control asthmatic, and then adding a newborn to the mix in 2010...yes, you get a sleep-deprived, stressed momma.

And I will admit that I become easily overwhelmed by my own lack of discretion over my time. My husband asks, "Why do you say yes to everyone?"  Because I feel that if I say 'no' and don't get out this cave, I get a bit on edge, if you know what I mean.

It is not healthy for my mind and soul to stay home, day after day...I need people. I need to talk.....to adults. Otherwise, I nearly spontaneously combust! My high-energy needs somewhere to go...and when it doesn't I become a 'high-anxiety' mom! :(  Yet, if I commit to go-go-go...guess what I become again by overcommitting. It's one of those crazy cycles I am trying to find balance for.

Since I'm naturally a problem-solver, I have been looking at my life and finding where I can unplug the "anxiety". It's a household word these days unfortunately. Many people need medical assistance with it. It's a very real, physical thing that takes place in the body. But before I reach that boiling point, I'm searching my life and looking for what needs to go to make for a better, peaceful, more pleasant/balanced mom.

So what is my solution? (Confession time!)

1. I've been weaning myself off the caffeine in the last week - yes, I too never thought I would see the day. I was drinking, in the morning - 8 cups of coffee...8 cups = 8 scoops of coffee. Each day I have decreased my 'dosage' by 1 scoop. And I'm proud to say that I am down to 1 scoop of regular coffee & 1 scoop of decaf this morning (and yes, I did get up at 5:15 a.m.). I quickly cut out p.m. caffeine on day 1 which was usually tea, sometimes green tea, and sometimes more coffee. (Probably got to this point from all the sleep I've lost since...ooooo....Daniel was born in 2007.) The thought occurred to me that the caffeine (in the dosing of 8 cups) probably really sets me on edge first thing in the morning...THIS IS IN MY CONTROL...so I'm getting myself out from under the control of the caffeine. This will leave my body at more peace.
2. Now I am trying so hard to not say "YES" to everything. Everything is the keyword here. There are times I need to say YES...but not always. This is sooooooo hard for me because I love helping people. Because our world is so high-techy, people are so consumed w/ their inboxes that they don't see those within arm distance reaching out to them in need. I, on the otherhand, have such heart to see people overcome, reach their goals, grow, change, get saved, grow closer to God, etc...I too often drop what I am doing for THEM...leaving my kids to entertain themselves - NO BUENO! The kids get whiny, I get stressed out and bam - meltdown!....THIS IS IN MY CONTROL...In order to have happy, satisfied kids who don't throw fits for mommy's attention, (leaving me overwhelmed & mad at myself/guilt-stricken) - I must detach myself a bit to the world outside my home, to be more available to my kids! This will bring me peace of mind and harmony to my home.

These seem to me 2 things that I can work on now today, this week!

Let me leave you with this verse and what I saw that I had never put together before:

.....THE LORD IS NEAR. Be anxious for nothing...

Found in Philippians 4:5, 6

I read it: Be anxious for nothing because the Lord IS near!

Finally....the rest of verse 6 - but through prayer & petition make your requests known...sometimes that process of prayer leaves me more stressed out then when I started...Yes, I know...there's more to it of why and how. But in a nutshell, sometimes when I go to pray over something that is stressing me out...I get more stressed. Sorry.

But the light bulb went on this week for me:

But because the Lord is near...He is in arm's reach - I do not need to be anxious for nothing. See, being anxious, fretful, and worried leaves us vulnerable to trials and temptations (read this in John MacArthur's commentary).

How often do we want to binge on cookies when the baby is crying, the noodles are boiling over, the phone is ringing, and your oldest just wrecked his bike in the backyard? AAAAAAHHHHH! Right?

The Lord is near to the brokenhearted

saves those who are crushed in spirit.

Psalm 34:18

I do pretty well at spending time with the Lord in the morning...my attempts to get filled up for the day. But I must stay mindful of His omnipresence throughout my day.

Time for accountability:

1. I must be responsible to get plenty of rest to not need my caffeine jolt in the a.m.
2. I must remind myself that it's my privilege to raise two mini-men of God for the future generations.
3. I must embrace selflessness and not give into the self-pity party of 'what about me?'
4. My relationship with my husband must be the most important human relationship I have.
5. I must be a peaceful/pleasant wife overflowing w/ "soothing, comforting, supportive" love to my family.

I know I can do these things because:

• "I can do all things through Him who strengthens me." (Phil. 4:13)
• "MY God will supply all my needs according to His riches..." (Phil. 4:19)

So what's the mini-goals:

1. Get off the caffeine.
2. Stay committed to the time I've given my kids.
3. Run on time for my kids and husband.
4. Be diligent with my time & be a worker of my home (leaving it in order).
5. Fulfill my hearts desires of being available to my family above and beyond others.
6. Check my calendars and kids' love tanks before I say 'yes' to others.

When I do these things, I will (hopefully)

reach the ultimate goal of:

Turn down the anxiety/stress &

turn up the peace & harmony in the home!